Tag Archives: working parents

Hug Your Kids Project Like a St. Bernard

The Hug Your Kids project "hounded" me like a drooly, deep-eyed St. Bernard

I tried to put my Hug Your Kids project on the back burner, but it was like a big St. Bernard dog that kept hounding me (pardon the pun) and begging me to take him  home and love him.

“It’s not logical, especially not in this economy,” I told him. He just looked at me with his deep, brown eyes and gave me a crazy, drooly smile.  He seemed to say, “I know it’s not logical, but if you do you’ll be rewarded in ways you can’t even imagine.” How could I resist a sales pitch like that? So I’m resuming full-time work on the Hug Your Kids project.

Step One is to get our official non-profit status. I’ve already started the paperwork. Step Two is to rename the holiday Global Hug Your Kids Day, and start to encourage folks all across the US and even the world to organize small events in their town, in honor of a special kid or just for all the families nearby. I’ll cross-promote them through Hug Your Kids, like a hub. http://www.HugYourKidsToday.com

So, Happy 2010. ‘Hope it’s full of great hugs – and don’t forget, to hug your kids and your spouse/ partner today!

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“Hug Your Kids” says Cincinnati Reds Baseball Manager Dusty Baker about Adenhart

The Cincinnati Reds showed Nick Adenhart’s photo on the video board and asked fans to stand and remove their hats for a moment of silence in his memory before the seventh-inning stretch during their game against the New York Mets. “It makes you want to hug your kids. It just goes to show you, tomorrow’s not promised to anybody, so enjoy today,” Reds manager Dusty Baker said.

Adenhart was the 22-year-old rookie was among three people who died early Thursday after their car was struck by a motorist who ran a red light. He made his season debut a few hours earlier in a loss to Oakland. It was just the fourth start and appearance of his major league career.

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Unemployment Can Be a Gift to Mothers

Businesspeople often talk about “unintended consequences,” but here’s one I didn’t think of. NPR just published a story about how executive women who lost their jobs recently are spending more time with their kids and learning more about them. They’re spending time with their children at their schools, daycares and doctor’s offices, apparently places the nannies went in their stead when the moms worked full time. http://tinyurl.com/cspcds

What do you think? I think it’s an opportunity for the kids have quality time. I know it’s hard to see unemployment as a gift to mothers , but from a kid’s view, it just might be. 

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Parents Should NOT Balance Work and Family

For working parents these days, it’s like we’re fighting in a smoke-filled room. It’s  critical to discern what is important, and what is not so important, which comes from prioritizing.

I believe that work-life balance is the wrong goal. When you’re trying to hold onto your job AND keep your family relationships going, then “balance” is an illogical, impossible – and downright dangerous plan. It’s illogical because work and family are not of equal value, impossible because there is no conversion rate for work and family so they can’t be balanced, and dangerous because work is ultimately replaceable and family is irreplaceable so your health can be put at risk if they are made equal.

Instead, I recommend people prioritize. It’s not 50% work and 50% family; it’s family first and work a close second! That means, hug your kids, spouse/partner/loved ones – and then get to work. By taking care of the most important thing first, it lets people focus on their work and get more done! For more info, http://www.hugyourkidstoday.com

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Mom Buys New Basketball Hoop for Better Parent-Child Communications

My son recently had his 12th birthday and my hubby and I bought him a basketball hoop. I’m not trying to raise the next NBA star (OK, I’ve started too late for this goal anyway,) but I was also thinking that maybe my son and I could spend some time together shooting baskets while we talk about his day, his dreams and of course, girls.

Sure there’s a depression, recession, or whatever, but he’ll only be 12 once – and I’ll only be this age once too. Parenthood is a gift and it’s fleeting. For more info: www.hugyourkidstoday.com

Daniel Levine, a trend spotter at the Avant-Guide Institute who analyzes social trends recently said “People are being more value conscious, but just as important, they’re being more conscious of their values, and what that means is that they’re looking for experiences that speak to their heart.”

Anyone for a game of Horse?

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Dr. Laura Schlessinger Unrealistic for Many Moms and Dads

I submitted my book for Dr. Laura Schlessinger to review recently and Teresa Arriaza, her Programming Assistant, told me that they had rejected it because Dr. Laura doesn’t believe mothers should work.

So I asked, how about single moms and single dads?  Are they all supposed to go on welfare?

Here is Ms. Arriaza’s reply: Dr. Laura’s position has always been to do what’s best for the children.  If a parent has to work, she recommends that they work during hours when the children are asleep or when the other parent is at home.

My thoughts? This all sounds great on paper but it’s unrealistic for many moms and dads. If a single parent works when a child is asleep, then the parent must sleep when the child is awake, and that is a safety issue. Ask any parent who has been up with a fussy baby for several nights in a row and they will admit it’s downright dangerous. Over the long term, that is NOT “what’s best for the children.”

 

And for families where the parents share the childcare, the parents often don’t see each other enough to maintain their marriage and end up divorced. That is NOT “what’s best for the children” either. 

 Even some married parents have to contend with this issue. Maybe their spouse is serving in the military overseas, is disabled, or is on a non-military assignment out of the area.

 Or maybe one spouse chooses a profession that doesn’t pay enough to support a family, like being a teacher or a nurse. There are many instances where both parents have to work, just to pay base-level bills.

 

Few single mothers WANT to put their kids in childcare, but it’s really a safer solution to have the children play while their mom’s at work, so they can all sleep at the same time.

 

‘Hope this doesn’t sound like sour grapes. I admire all she’s accomplished, and putting children first is absolutely the right thing. But there are lots of parents who have to work. Granted, there are many who don’t, who work anyway. But to lump them all together doesn’t serve anyone.

 

I wish Dr. Laura would broaden her view to help more working parents. My message, “Hug your kids, then get to work,” at least makes sure the most important thing you’ll do all day, gets done first.

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BusinessWeek Readers Say Balancing Work-Life #1 Problem

In June 2008, BusinessWeek asked their readers what was their most pressing workplace problem.

Survey says? #1 was  “balancing work-life responsibilities.”

And yet I’ve been called to lead the NEXT wave of conversation about work and life, because “balance” is a dumb idea. Besides being unattainable, at least for more than a nanosecond, it’s the wrong goal.  Check it out at http://www.hugyourkidstoday.com

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